New Life Old Farmers

I am struggling to find the words to explain the last 6 months. I have had this post rattling around in my head for weeks. I have tried to not write it, but at the end of the day, who is this blog really for? I don’t know. Someday these words may be the way my grandchildren or grandchildren’s children know me. Obviously, they will know I’ve made some mistakes (remember, the Fire Captain said it wasn’t my fault I caught that field on fire), but will they know that my most important job is to ‘love’.

When we moved to Ellensburg, we quickly found our church home. We love the congregation, a collection of caring/giving (jump in and help) kind of people. They put their love in action. We care about them and are grateful they are our friends.

Six months ago, we started hearing a message from the ‘top’, from the Pastor…one that said, that Homosexuals were less than… I quite literally could not believe my ears…and it broke my heart.

My dear Grandkids…this is what I believe… Jesus said, the most important commandments are Love God, Love Your Neighbor and Love Yourself.

I talked with trusted and wise friends who belonged to our church. I felt fairly powerless, so I bought a dozen copies of Everybody, Always (Becoming love in a world full of difficult people and setbacks) and started giving them away.

I emailed the Pastor multiple times in regards to his stance, hoping and searching for elements of love and grace. Each answer held not only less love, but more judgement and said in ways, that was quite clear he wanted us to leave.

There is no ‘Ya, but’ in ‘love your neighbor’. We are to love those who annoy us, who vote for the other party, who are unkind to our kids or cheat us etc. Many believe that Gay people are sinners, well look in the mirror, we all are sinners and ‘have fallen short’. The problem with being judgmental over any others is that most people then say, ‘Ya, but….you are…” and judge your sins as well.

Love is usually not talk, it is action. Guess what, that included this Pastor. I didn’t want to ‘love him’, I wanted to say, “Ya, but he doesn’t…” I needed to ‘walk my talk’, so, as we have for many years, we offered to let him store his trailer in our barn during the winter. I inquired how I could pray for him (and I actually do it).

Recently, sadly and with great grief, we knew had to leave our beloved church, because as much as we wanted to stay with these loving people, we did not feel comfortable being aligned with the beliefs from the top. How do we leave gracefully? Leaving is hard. Will we loose some friends? We do not know…

Where will we go? Will there be another place for us? We are both weary and sad. I do believe that when our time ‘comes’, we might be asked how well we loved, I do not believe we will be asked did you judge each other enough?

..and still we are blessed.

We continue with our kitchen remodel and it feels very much like eating an elephant…one small bite at a time (even though I’ve never actually eaten an elephant, nor would I want to).

It helps to be optimistic when taking on a project of this scope, but it is possible that our optimism has moved into self delusion. We plan 3 things to complete in one day and by the end of a 3 day week end, we’ve managed to complete half of them.

We install most of the base boards. This entails crawling on one’s knees, so I am elected to run the nail gun and the stud finder. There is a small spat about how I am using the stud finder, (ya that’s been a problem most of my life). We disagree over whether the problem is user error or instructor error…. Eventually, we get it done.

We get the cabinet installed over the refrigerator, which entails framing it out and having a shelf for it to sit on. Our newest phrase is…’we’ll caulk it’.

Each additional cabinet that goes into place means more storage! I get to put stuff away! My Loving Spouse is sure that this is mostly a plot to keep him confused about where things are.

I get to watch the back of his head, as we install nobs.

Black on white is beautiful and a bit tricky to get everything lined up.

Even the smallest steps bring joy!

My job is “Step and Fetch it”, trust me, I am well trained!

We install the long awaited cabinet, the one that I goofed up on ordering…again…progress.

Each step makes us happy, but the truth is, we are ready to be done! We’re almost there we just need to …

caulk, paint, install peninsula (which is in the family room), caulk, drywall, tile back splash, build the benches, build the table, build the steps and railing and ‘knees’, finish the window trims, the door to the broom closet, caulk, build the door jam, install toe kick….

so that’s not much…

Yes, we love our old house..

and we are blessed

Sung to the tune of “One More Day” (Yeah, not really, but it kept going through my head).

We started setting the insulation, in a fashion most would say is ‘upside down’.

However, since we had the ‘luxury’ of having the floor joist exposed, we were able to insulate our ‘craw-less’ space. We felt warmer with every piece.

I wonder what everyone else I work with is doing during vacation.

We do a masterful job of installing the new sub floor and begin day 3 taking down the old cabinets.

We find a message left by the last ones to work behind these walls…

We also find old wall paper.

Oh, yes and the ‘message’…well, I really am too tired to make this stuff up.

A clear indication that there might have been teenagers in the house…

We finish pulling down the old false ceiling and gleefully destroy the rest of the old poorly functioning kitchen.

After another trip to the dump, our third in three days, we begin installing the rest of the kitchen floor.

We bought engineered bamboo from Lumber Liquidators.

The flooring is hard!

A renewable resource, the bamboo is great value for money

We planned on 15% wastage..

However, our wastage is so low, we’ll have enough to redo the floor in the old laundry room.

I am wearing my ‘flooring’ sneakers, which work well with gently prodding the flooring into their proper space, before whacking them into place.

Easy peasy and three days later…

We are done!

Ta Da! We’ve got our floor in…dusty and saw-dusty! The main demo is done, the ‘putting together’ exciting at every turn…

we are grateful and indeed we are blessed.

Boxing day came with great anticipation. Faucet time! I am nominated since I have the smallest shoulders to crawl under the new sink.

This view only comes from underneath the sink, and I hook up my first sink ever! I am both proud of myself and understand why plumbers earn so much money.

My Loving Spouse gets his turn as well….unhooking up the old faucet. Yes, he has slightly more room than I did, but he also got wet.

We move the dishwasher, install the old sink into the new mud room and prepare….for ‘demo’ day.

I wake up, excited! I was dreaming. Some dream of Hawaii…I dream of demo!

This is the day, that we demolish the old kitchen. We’ve plans to remove all the lower cabinets and pull up the fir floor and sub floor.

A careful ‘whack-attack’ kind of day…

Pooh comes in to supervise.

Sometimes we get really smart, today was one of those days. We hired Young Buck for the day. He was a delightful worker. He worked hard, jumped in and worked along side us, really well. Not belonging to Team Offspring, we noticed he didn’t try to tell us, what we were doing ‘wrong’.

Have I told you, that Demo is my favorite?

The good news about working in the winter, is that you remember how cold it gets. We plan for insulation due to this reminder. Tomorrow’s plan is to insulate the floor, lay a new sub floor, level everything out and continue laying the engineered bamboo flooring.

We’ve waited a long time for this day…

We are tired….

and believe me, we are blessed.

“It came without ribbons, it came without tags. It came without packages, boxes, or bags.” – Dr. Seuss’ How The Grinch Stole Christmas

This advent has been like no other…

There are lights on the house, because we don’t take them down and most of them are actually working. If remodel dust was a Christmas decoration, we’d be the most decorated house in town. However, it is not and we are not and it is weird.

Two halves do not always make a whole. We have half of a new kitchen and half of an old kitchen and the only ‘whole’ it is making is a whole lot of mess.

We are in the Christmas spirit, it just weirdly doesn’t look like it. We didn’t decorate and we do not have a tree. We’re excited about the gifts we’re making and the meals we are sharing…

…and to be completely honest, we also feel a tad old and a tad worn out. (I can hear Team Offspring, saying well you are old, you’re just not ancient yet.) We’re most excited about our Christmas break from school to pour some energy into this kitchen remodel. We’re hoping for more demo, more dust and great, great progress.

We wish a Merry Dusty Christmas to you all,

..and we are grateful and blessed.

Hal is going to Finishing School. Finishing well is very important. We need to build him his own ‘room’. This room/corral needs to be in view of the rest of the herd, so he doesn’t feel lonely.

If you ever see a farm that is completely tidy with no old bits around, then they are very, very rich farmers. Everyone else keeps anything that might someday come in handy. Hence why on this balmy Saturday…

…we were building a corral with old fence gates, salvaged fence posts and bailing twine.

We dig a few posts…hydraulically, (after getting the tractor to start, Blue has a bad battery, so we cannot turn it off until we are completely done).

We gather up the old gates, while the herd looks on, wondering why they haven’t been fed.

Our new rooster, Russel Crow lets us know that it is well past dawn, even if it is a bit foggy.

We get ready for Hal to have his very own, water, hay and grain.

Isn’t it amazing what one can build with old gates and blue chain (baler twine)?

When Hal was born, my sweet sensitive son took one look at him and asked, “Can we eat him?”

The answer is finally…’almost’, we have to ‘finish’ him. This finishing is a process whereby Hal gets even more hay than normal and grain. The grain is a combo of sorts and will help his beef taste sweet and have the marbling we prefer. This is not an exact science (for us) and at the end of all of this, we will have approximately 500 pounds of beef, so getting it tasty is vital. We plan to sell half and keep half.

We head to the local feed store to buy our ‘grain’. The salesgirl starts to tell me about show steer feeds. I quickly say,

“I don’t care if he looks good, I just want him to taste good”.

“Oh, she says then you want the grain with corn and molasses.”

We also pick up our complimentary ‘Magic Reindeer Feed’ for THE Grands as well.

The pigs almost got out.

My horse did get out.

and the finishing has begun…

We are grateful and blessed.

Home is were your mess is…

Our RTA cabinets are great quality for money. However, the learning curve is a bit steep and the directions leave a bit to be desired. I wouldn’t even recommend them, unless you have one of these…’

My Loving Handy Spouse has spent a lot of time on the floor of our kitchen working on our mess.

Turning a mess into a treasure takes time and tools.

We people need the same, ears that hear with wisdom and truth.

Last week I was gifted a weekend with dear friends in my home town. When I get asked if I miss Southern California, I always say the same thing. I miss my family, special friends and La Cabinita’s green salsa. My friend tried to tell me, that La Cabinita had changed hands and the salsa might not be the same.

Isn’t that the truth, that going ‘home’ might not feel the same?

The weekend agenda was simple…talking, listening, laughing, shopping.

My suitcase had issues. Even though it was warm, I had to wear my bulkiest clothes. Crammed in the case was 6 white picture frames, a gifted wooden sign for the hen house, a new purse (that I NEEDED to carry the items that wouldn’t fit in the suitcase), one new top, 32 German sausages for Christmas eve dinner, a glass chicken bowl and a packet of shortbread.

“Home” should be a place or a people, where we can unpack our soul, our mess and find love, and truth and a hope to make a better life for those we serve. My dear sweet friends are also my ‘home’ as they embrace me and all of my messes and sooth my weary soul.

In the mess there should always be love and wisdom and…hope. My prayer for those who visit here, is that they will always feel free to share their ‘mess’ and find love and support.

PS: I don’t miss La Cabinita’s green salsa any more, but I am indeed, grateful and blessed.

My new pantry is Pinterest Perfect. Well, except for the fact that it doesn’t have a light, yet. We used melamine for the shelves. A tad pricey, but their Formica like boards will make cleaning up spills easy. The distance between the shelves is based on our pantry ‘stuff’, like the mixer and the big bottle of gin.

It doesn’t have a door yet either. Well, that is not actually true, it does have a door, it is just not installed. The door we bought at Earthwise, an architectural salvage store in Seattle for $35. It is currently being painted by My Loving Spouse in our ‘old’ laundry room.

The problem with painting in cold weather is, well…the cold weather. The temperature needs to be about 50 for the paint to dry properly. We explored all kinds of solutions before turning the old laundry room into a ‘paint studio’ of sorts. Emptying the laundry room, causes the mess in the living room to continue to grow.

The best part is that when we are not making a mess, we are making progress. Each piece that goes together, shows the kitchen coming together, just as we’ve dreamed.

Seriously, we’ve dreamed (and are dreaming) of it done, but still we know, that we are indeed blessed.

New cabinets were not in the original plan.

Have you ever heard that joke, how do you make God laugh?

(Answer: You make plans)

We had planned to reuse as many of our old cabinets as possible. However, when you join a new space to a very old space, some adaptations need to be made and this affected our ability to reuse most all of our old cabinets.

The new cabinets arrived! Yipee and yee-haw! Oh, and the truck they came on couldn’t fit down the driveway.

RTA – Ready To Assemble

It only takes us an hour to figure out that we did get the 26 items we ordered. It only takes assembling 2 cabinets to figure out that, we were not assembling them properly. Assembling them correctly certainly ups our opinion of their sturdiness. It only takes assembling cabinet 4 to find we/I ordered the wrong configuration, as it is 24 x 30, not 30 x 24.

We go to bed because we are tired. Everything seems better in the morning…with coffee…and a beautiful sunrise…

…and a new plan.

I can almost hear God laughing, but I do know for sure, we are blessed.